It’s been one of those sober weeks in life. After a 2600-mile road trip, a 12-ft moving van, 2 vehicles, an LA-to-Colorado plane flight, and multiple trips to the V.A., Social Security office, bank, notary, etc., the godly 91-yr-old patriarch of our home, now lives safe and secure 10 minutes from us. It’s a wonderful, yet poignant, season of life. This stalwart businessman and legacy-maker that raised my husband into the incredible man that he is, is noticeably weaker and more vulnerable, and in need of our hands-on love and attention, which we’re oh, so ready to provide!
For a week our whole family stopped the world to focus our attention on Dad. And as we’ve journeyed through this transition, I find I’m not yet ready to move on as if nothing’s changed – because it has. I desperately want to stop and ponder this precious generational shift and all the emotions it dredges up, including: the awe of a life well-lived, the fragility of life here on earth, the joy of the 5th commandment to honor our father and mother – even the reality of my own mortality and a reassessment of my priorities.
And yet I can’t climb into a monastic hole and ponder right now….life goes on! Ironically, today our third child heads off to college. Once again our family will embark upon a road trip, but this time it’s 12-hr-drive in the opposite direction: to a college campus where he will now venture out on his own, pursuing the dreams God has birthed in him, and which Steve & I have been privileged to nurture and marvel at for the past 18 years.
What an odd moment. To look above us and see the legacy of an amazing grandfather, and glance below and watch the emergence of a young man (who, ironically again, bears the same name as his Grandpa Kenneth!)
And while it’s true that I cannot escape to a mountain of solitude right now to fully process all my emotions, I assure you, this moment is not lost on me. It’s changed who I am. In the midst of rushing from a Social Security appointment to a Wal-Mart run for college dorm supplies, I’m drinking in life at a deeper level, cherishing every moment. I’m not taking the “daily-ness” of life for granted any more. Seize the day.
We are at a similar stage in our lives. My 91 year old mother went to be with the Lord in May after moving back home from Arizona 3 years earlier (my dad died in late 2010 at 90). It was great to have them back with the family for the last months of their lives and we were able to throw a 70th anniversary party for them only 5 months before my dad found out he had 2 brain tumors which sent him to be with our Lord only 6 weeks later. Our son graduated from high school in June, but is living a prodigal lifestyle and probably won't be going to even community college and he's not looking for a job, either. He's claiming to be an atheist and is in a relationship with a girl who has said she is a Satan worshiper. He's not motivated to do anything with his life except stay in a relationship with a girl who is every parent's worst nightmare. I hope you don't think I'm bitter that your son and your older children have turned out the way we had hoped and prayed that our children would (our 20 year old daughter is in college and still going to church with us). I know God has a plan and since we have very little input in what our son does now, we just have to leave him in God's hands and pray a lot. If anyone has a chance to pray for our son, his name is Daniel.
ReplyDeleteHow our "mothers' hearts" ache along with yours -- What a year this has been for you! "Oh Lord, hear the prayer of this precious mom, whose heart is breaking for her son. Bring Daniel and his girlfriend to a deep understanding of Your love for them. Don't let the enemy devour the years of their youth; may Daniel arise as a man of God, fully committed to your will for his life. Amen and amen...let it be so." You are loved, my friend <3
DeleteMy heart goes out to you. I have been dealing with a similar situation on a different scale. I will pray for your son. "by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving!" I have asked everyone I know that believes in Lord Jesus to pray for my son and my family. It's so hard to see them doing wrong and the pain it will inevitably bring them. I have prayed that God will get my own child to zero. He does his best work with us when we are at zero and have nothing. Let's just keep loving our kids and praying for God's almighty power and authority in their lives!
DeleteAmen....Keep standing in the gap! I stand with you for victory in your family.
DeleteEvery Christmas, I hang the ornament you made me oh-so-long ago, and remember fondly, your visit to Idaho. How happy I was to read that Uncle Kelly is with you guys. Blessings on your ministry and family!
ReplyDeleteWith love from an extended family member ;)
LaRona (Crane) Ezell
La Rona -- oh my, it's so good to hear from you. I just now found this response from you buried here somehow. Yes! We are thrilled that Dad Crane is now just minutes away from us here in Colorado Springs. What a blessing and legacy he has given to us. Oh, how we love the Cranes! Give our love to your whole family.
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